Oh how I have wanted to blog, but something called an 8 hour workday combined with little nieces and unread books on my Kindle have gotten in the way of that.
So what brings me here tonight? A panic attack. Simple as that.
Everybody knows Facebook. It's that place where you brag about how awesome your life is, or if your life sucks, people pump you up to make you feel better.
But when you're like me, and you have nothing fantastic to brag about (well... I guess I do have some things) Facebook is where I go to see how much my life sucks.
Well... my life rocks.
But still, every now and then I'll spy the wild relationship status change. At first I'm all "Yay! Like! " and then five minutes later, it sets in. Real hard.
A reminder that I'm still single and I have one less single friend.
It feels like being part of a duo. You're inseparable! Everything is fun and you're able to share awesomeness with them and then you're alone screaming "I THOUGHT WE WERE IN THIS TOGETHER!!!"
That's how it feels.
And then comes the whole "What am I doing wrong? Why not me?" and then I sob myself to sleep.
A bit of an exaggeration.
But there's a little something I have in my mind that's keeping me a little more balanced. About 9 months ago, I was in the bathroom crying at a wedding reception. Why? Well, the happiness was overwhelming from the bride and the groom. I told myself I would just have fun and not be sad, but I just couldn't. He was too proud of himself and was in love with the idea of being in a relationship and getting married. She was known for being no good but magically turned into daughter-in-law material while they were dating. They were one of those couples on Facebook.
Just knowing how they were and that they managed to find love baffled me when I couldn't get a guy to look my way even if I was on fire.
Well, 9 months and a baby and signs of insincerity later, they're separating.
What does that tell me?
Stop being jealous!
So once this panic attack subsides, I'll be getting back on the happy train. And I totally need to. Got my friend's bridal shower to go to!
